I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
God I need to hump something, right now.
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize
