OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
Randomize
