so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives�
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
Randomize
