She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
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