I called you to phone bone last night, but you were out with your boring friends playing video games
He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
You think the Elephant Man ever tried to pick up chicks claiming all his appendages were elephant-sized?
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
I think i got beer on your cat.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
Randomize