He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
Can't talk, ducks in the car
Randomize
