When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
I bet he’d be surprised by the epic blow job he’d get if he stopped talking about his wife long enough for me to get in the mood
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