You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
this is a save-me-from-tijuana-tequila-and-hoookers booty call. if i don't hear from you by 8pm i'm grabbing my passport
if i'm not back tomorrow call the embassy
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
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