i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
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