my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
I have tasted many bathrooms
Randomize
