I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
Observations from Vegas: #1. Strippers pasties pose a choking hazard. #2. Best. Heimlich. Ever.
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
Do you have feelings for this penis?
Randomize
