Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
I may have to marry her. She is smarter than me and has a six figure job and doesn't want to have kids. All I have to be is a trophy husband.
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
I told you when I started the only reason I was gonna coach your kids soccer team was that I could meet all the hot soccer moms. So why are you so mad I slept with your ex?
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
Randomize
