Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
When you're opening a bottle of tequila with a golf club, it's probably time to stop drinking...
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
so the x-ray technician didnt buy my story of falling off a curb. she said a fall of that height couldnt snap the bone that way. bitch called me a drunken idiot too. if she wasnt so hot i'd be angry
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
You know, I think I'm going to rock the shit out of this whole mid-twenties thing. Fuck babies and weddings -- I have vodka and young cock.
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
Randomize
