The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
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