We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize
