$35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively.
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
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