My cat gives me a boner
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
COCAINE IS GR8
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
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