yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
y did u give ur computer a hand job?
Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
Well when I woke up this morning I didn’t think I’d be masturbating to my own LinkedIn profile today but here we are
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