ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
Can I borrow your pants?
WTH?
Just come to the men’s room and help me. The blonde bartender figured out I’m married. Rachel will definitely notice if come home pantsless
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