Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
My STD test came back clean. I'd like to thank all the guys I've slept with, they made this possible. I want to say thanks to all my friends, for believing in me living up to the full slut potential. And last but not least, I'd like to thank alcohol. I wouldn't be who I am today w/out you. I feel like I need to frame this...
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
Lack of response to this text gains you a half hour of freedom before I initiate operations to conclude you are not, in fact, comatose. You requested no mercy.
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
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