After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
I slept with one of the directors so you would get a good price on the ballroom for your reception. I'm the best MOH. You owe me bitch
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
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