On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
Fuck morning classes. Fuck early work. Fuck anything in the morning that doesn't involve sleeping, sex or bacon.
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
I’m going to bedazzle that dick
What does that even mean
No idea, but I guarantee he’ll get hard every time he remembers it
Randomize
