I must be too annoying 4 u.
u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
I had to explain to an ER nurse that I burned my dick playing onion ring toss today, your social awkwardness hardly compares.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Randomize
