so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
Found a fruit roll up in my pocket this morning. This means my daughter has a peach blunt wrap in her lunchbox.
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
How is there no taco emoji?! That's some bullshit.
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
What part of don't open in front of your kids didn't you understand? Astroglide, magnums, fuzzy handcuffs and a blindfold are going to be hard to explain as friends presents.
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
Randomize
