8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
I currently don't understand fingers.
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