i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
Randomize
