why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
i guess its not very common for a paramedic to have to revive someone who was struck by a falling shampoo bottle while getting off from the bathtub faucet.
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
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