if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
Enjoy the penises
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
Randomize
