turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
*swallows 40 gallons of heavy water and astral projects into buzzfeed* Top Ten Reasons Why I Am God
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize
