she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
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