I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
the only evidence i have from this weekend existing is a title page for a novel i tried writing called "the oyster who gave up drinking"
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
His wife isn’t coming to the wedding! I’ve got 48 hours to home wreck him. Gotta go, I have to shave my vajayjay and buy some really slutty underwear. Love you!
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