We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
I'm like, not good at living.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
