I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
