The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
We're not piercing ourselves today.
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Randomize
