I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
anyone who says having children is the best experience of their life obviously has never seen a vending machine carry vodka in Capri sun pouches.
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize
