When you only buy popcorn and condoms at the grocery store they know whats up.
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize
