hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
Randomize
