So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize
