I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
Randomize
