His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
You're earring is so big in my mouth
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Randomize
