I just wanna be some guy's midlife crisis
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
he proceeded to punch 3 mailboxes in a row and when i asked him why, he said "because they were talking shit"... i need a new boyfriend. and a new life.
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
You came in as I got off work, ordered us jack and cokes. Put them on my tab, and then proceeded to fall asleep on the bar.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
I just took a condom out of my purse and opened it in front of my entire family because I thought it was a wetnap. Way too hungover for family brunch.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Randomize
