**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
Gettin pulled over, can you watch my dog and pay the bils for a while?
Taylor Swift is so right about you.
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
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