it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
You tried to prove you weren't drunk by loudly singing the romanian national anthem. Why the fuck do you even KNOW the romanian national anthem?
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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