There is no way he is gay with that hair.
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
The housekeeper found my huge dildo under the bathroom sink, and another in the living room. I can't get much more single than this.
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
Randomize
