fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
Randomize
