2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
Randomize
