When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
After much deliberatipn and vodka, my favourite phrase of Christmas 2012 is "penis of last resort"
I don't know if I want context or not...
Context involves faux incest and champagne. Id go into detail but im on shot number 5.
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
Randomize
