Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
My breakfast consisted of a slimfast and an adderal. My fridge is like an insecurity buffet.
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
Randomize
