she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
Randomize
