I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
The second time he came it projectile shot in my ear
We were in a spooning position and it shot all the way up. He was like sorry. Physics.
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
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